


love, sex, and daemons

by aisu10



Category: Kill Your Darlings (2013)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Daemons, Aromantic, Asexual Character, Asexuality, Daemons, Gen, M/M, and daemons!!!!!!!!!!!, aroace lu!!!!!!
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-03-29
Updated: 2015-03-29
Packaged: 2018-03-20 07:08:44
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,289
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3641280
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/aisu10/pseuds/aisu10
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"what do daemons do during sex?"</p>
            </blockquote>





	love, sex, and daemons

**Author's Note:**

> i gave them the same daemons they had in [my last fic](http://archiveofourown.org/works/1510244); lucien's is a serval named tamesis (tam/tammy), allen's is a vole named anthemia (annie), david's is a great grey owl named adora, bill's is a green iguana, and jack's is a wolverine. [i made photosets with pictures of them on my blog!](http://andrewdetmer.co.vu/tagged/kill+your+darlings+daemon+au/)

"what do daemons do during sex?"

allen asks it out of the blue and everyone turns to stare at him before lucien scoffs,

"well _i_ don't know -- ask jack, i'm sure _he_ does." 

jack frowns at lu's suggestive grin, but answers,

"they dance."

"they _dance?"_ allen repeats, brow furrowing and lips twisting into a funny smile.

"yeah, they _dance_ , y'know -- they just hop and skip and roll around together."

"so you're telling me your _wolverine_ has _danced_ with edie's _snow goose?”_ lucien asks with a smirk -- “i would have liked to see that."

“i bet you _would_ \-- ”

jack moves to tackle lucien and lucien cries for allen’s aid between giggles but allen ignores him, lost in thought.

 

( as annie crawls beneath his hand,

         he looks at tam's supple back

            and wonders if she will ever

                     get to dance with him. )

 

"last night she was at my window again."

"who?"

lucien nudges allen's shoulder and surreptitiously points to david sitting across the bar. his daemon is perched on his arm.

"the owl?"

"yeah, she caught me _masturbating_."

allen's eyes widen. "really?"

lucien slips out of his chair and tam hops down from the counter. "i'm going to talk to him."

allen waits at his seat trying to pretend that his blush is from the wine he's downing.

“if you wanted me to tease you, you should have just _asked,"_ lucien says as he walks up and slides into the seat across from david, stealing his drink and stealing a sip from it. 

“i don’t want you to tease me,” david says quietly.

“then stop sending _her_ to _spy on_ _me._ ”

david is quiet for a long moment, stroking his fingers through his owl's feathers.

“...i’d let you touch her, if you wanted to.”

lucien looks up in surprise.

“even if you wouldn’t let me do the same.” 

tam’s spine tenses. lucien is _morbidly_ curious, wondering what touching adora would _do_ to david -- what new _power_ it would bring him over the man who’s already wrapped around his fingers, fingers that twitch with the impulse to just reach out and _touch_ \-- but tam nips his wrist to stop him, whispering "too far.”

lucien puts david's empty glass back on the table and returns to allen.

 

( lucien doesn’t think he’ll ever let anyone touch tam.

              if he doesn’t even let them touch his body,

   he’s certainly not going to let them touch his _soul._ )

 

allen is doing homework when tam suddenly jumps on his desk and scatters his pencils. startled, he turns around to see lucien and bill at the door, wearing their coats.

“come on ginsy, we’re going out.”

allen sighs but gathers his writing materials and closes his books. “where to?”

“david’s. i need to pick up my essay.” tam bounds across the room to rejoin lucien, rubbing against the leg of his pants as allen stands and puts annie in his shirt pocket for warmth.

“and you can’t do that on your own?”

“if i go _alone_ , he’ll make me _stay_.”

allen doesn’t complain after that, animatedly debating various aspects of the new vision with lucien and bill as they board the train downtown. lucien takes one seat and crosses his legs. tam sprawls out across two more.

when they arrive, lucien walks up to the apartment to retrieve his essay while bill and allen watch from the curb, making their presence known.

“was lucien ever in love with him?” allen whispers to bill as david answers the door with that same look of _desperate_ adoration he always gives him, which turns sour the moment he sees that he has company.

the iguana in bill’s arms shakes her head. bill gives allen a knowing look that, by the downturned corners of his lips, might even be described as _sad._

“no, i’d say he's never been in love. at least not the way we _earthlings_ understand it..."

“i don’t think he’s capable of it,” adds the iguana in her low rasp.

lucien joins them again with the essay and a couple dollars he managed to squeeze out of david and says, “now let’s go drink ‘till we _pass out_.”

 

( allen’s never been in love, either,

  but when annie is asleep on tam’s head

       and lucien lays his upon allen’s chest to hear

             his heartbeat, he thinks he might be now. )

 

lucien brings girls home occasionally, when he’s drunk and frisky and craving meaningless affection. allen happens to be in his bed on one such night, and watches as lucien collapses on the couch with his girl, growling and nipping at her neck. they kiss and kiss but as much as she fingers his belt, it never comes undone. he kicks her out very unceremoniously the moment he grows tired of her moaning. joining allen on the bed afterward, lucien pours him a drink of the whiskey he nicked from the bar and takes his own gulps directly from the bottle. allen immediately begins to protest in guilt.

“you didn’t have to kick her out, i could have left -- ”

“allen, it’s fine.”

“you two could have taken the bed -- ”

“ _no_ , allen, i said it’s _fine._ ”

he takes another swig from the bottle, swallowing hard and muttering,

“it’s not like i had any _feelings_ for her, anyway...”

allen is quiet, staring down at his untouched glass.

“do you _ever_ let them stay the night?”

“no.”

“...do you ever have sex with them?”

lucien knocks back the last of the whiskey with a sigh, then jabs the neck of the bottle at the serval sitting, expressionless, beside him.

“tammy doesn’t like _dancing_.”

 

( annie’s small enough to weave her body

 around the bones of allen’s fingers in a dance

     of her own and she’s lithe and graceful but _partnerless_

     and they think tam might like dancing if he only _tried it._ )

 

lucien gets _close_ , he gets so _close_ to allen but they never collide -- barely grazing each other like two planets on separate paths, littering the cosmos with sparks of _potential_ , a million possibilities never realized. he wants to sleep _beside him_ but not _with him_ , he wants to kiss his cheek in celebration but not his lips in lust. they’re more _intimate_ than any friends should be and the new vision is a love letter that lucien _asked him_ to write, but lucien’s own notebook is blank.

“i think you’re _scared_ , lu.”

“scared of _what?_ ”

“scared of _feeling_. scared of _being yourself._ that’s why you can’t write.”

“fuck you.”

tam hisses threateningly at annie and allen retreats, hides his daemon in his hands. lucien’s drank too much; this is a conversation for another night.

 

( allen lies awake in lucien’s bed

 and decides he needs to _know._ )

 

“first thought, best thought.”

on the waterfront allen kisses lucien the way he wants to, the way he thinks lucien is afraid to. and lucien _tries,_ he _lets_ himself kiss back, _lets_ himself touchannie’s red-brown fur. the planets collide for a single heartbeat; allen gasps and tam’s fur bristles and annie _jolts_ as if she’s been electrified -- and for a moment, when allen’s hand reaches for tam’s golden forehead lucien wonders if maybe, just _maybe_ \-- he’d _let him_ \--

\-- but it feels _wrong_ , just as it always has, just as it always will. lucien can only _take_ , never _give_. so before allen makes contact lucien pulls away and releases him and his daemon into the cold night air with a whisper of, “ _too far_ , ginsy.”

when he leaves he takes so much warmth and light with him that even the rising sun can’t bring it back. still _taking._ not because he’s scared, because it’s all he _can_ do.

annie shivers in allen’s hands and finally they understand.

 

( tammy _doesn’t_ dance

 and lucien doesn't _give_ more

                           than a kiss. )

**Author's Note:**

> happy kyd-iversary to me!!!! it's been a year since i first watched this movie and fell in love.


End file.
